Hey, Rexman! Hell of a situation we got here. Two on, two out, you guys trailing by one in the ninth. You got a chance to be a hero on national television… if you don’t blow it. By the way, I saw your wife at the Capri Lounge last night. Hell of a dancer. You must be very very proud. Oh, and that guy she was with? Oh, i’m sure he’s a close personal friend and all, but tell me, what was he doing wearing her panties on his head? – Jake Taylor "Major League"

27 Oct

What is up kids?

i’ll tell you what’s up, the World Series starts tonight!  And not just any ol World Series, it’s the first time that the New York Mets are in the World Series since the year 2000!  Which was over 25 years ago at this point!

And a LOT has happened since the last time the Mets were in the World Series.  Our nation was attacked on 9/11 changing the way we look at things forever.  We elected the first black President while Joe Rogan went from just being a fool from “Fear Factor” and UFC to the Timothy Leary of our time.  KFC figured out a way to make a sandwich where they used chicken as the bread with delicious bacon and cheese in between and McDondald’s not to be outdone figured out how to make a breakfast sandwich that had syrup infused pancakes as their bread.  Not to mention Burger King introduced a “Black” Whopper which apparently makes your poop green.  And some other stuff happened too but that more or less sums it up i guess.

Plus i’ve grown a lot personally since the last time the Mets were in the World Series.  Back then i was a young alcoholic who did tons of drugs and would do power hours and play beer pong until i woke up covered in puke and pizza and empty White Castle boxes as i watched movies on my VCR with my friends.  Now i’m older and i hardly eat White Castle and i smash VHS tapes instead!  My how things have changed!

But the truth is, this World Series is more then just a game for me.  This has been an AMAZIN’ playoff run and i really believe to the bottom of my pizza and puke stained soul that the Mets are going to win it this year.  And trust me, i know it will NOT be easy.  The Kansas City Royals have a great team, and they JUST lost in the World Series last year and you know they’re super pissed off and motivated and do NOT want that to happen again.

But i truly believe we are going to win this series my friends.  i’ve been a Mets fan my entire life, and while i was too young to remember their win back in 1986 i was definitely old enough to understand what was going on in 2000 when we got spanked by the Yankees.  And during that entire time there was never one point that i thought the Mets were going to win that series.  Alright fine, maybe in game one where we had the lead in the 9th inning and our “unstoppable” closer Armando Bentiez had a chance to win it and instead he f*cking blew it and then we were FINITO.

But like S.E Hinton once said that was then and THIS is now.  THIS year is different.  THIS year i know we’re gonna win!  Because THIS year the New York Mets stop being the joke around here and instead bring back all of the true fans, all of the dreamers, all of the lovers of the Underdog and we take back this town and our championship, and it all f’n starts TONIGHT!!!  So grab you peanuts and cracker jack, get ready for nonstop anxiety and heart stopping action for the next 4 to 7 games and let’s all hope that the Mets can go out and finish this incredible run because right now there is nothing we want more then to win THIS!!!  LET’S GO METS!


– Am i the only person who doesn’t give a $hit about pumpkin flavored anything? i know that most girls get moist as soon as the weather gets a little cooler and every store on earth starts releasing pumpkin flavored nonsense.  i mean i GUESS pumpkin flavors are alright once in awhile, but do you know what flavor is even better?  Pretty much every gddamn flavor on the planet.  And i don’t get all of this bull$hit with pumpkin picking either.  What’s the joy in picking large ass pumpkins that i can just go buy at the store?  Is it just the fun of being outdoors in trees and doing something that white people love to do?  Or is this all just a plot of women who want to make us men believe that they love pumpkins when in reality they just love getting us away from the television and watching college and/or NFL football for 2 seconds and put us through the hell they think we put them through for making them give up their entire weekend for football?  i don’t know and i don’t care, and Charlie Brown can suck on my great pumpkins all Halloween for all i give a pumpkin flavored $hit.

– Is there anything more depressing then paying bills?  Seriously, the joy of being paid gets erased IMMEDIATELY after you pay bill after bill.  And there’s always the ones you forget, like that Discover card you never use, or that $60 it takes to fill up your car, or the $25 you need to refill your EZ pass, or that $10 monthly cream you have to take for that “rash” that never seems to go away.  That’s why after work on Friday i always go to happy hour before i pay any of my bills.  This way i can have at least ONE night of fun before the reality that i should not have spent $80 on rounds of fireball whiskey shots hits me HARD the next day along with a horrific hangover to boot no doubt…

“OLD SCHOOL” NONSENSE – So after my whole not paying bills rant a bunch of people asked me, “Why don’t you do automatic debit for you bills?  They just take it right out of your account so this way you always pay bills on time!”  Wow, that is fantastic advice!  i can’t see any flaws in that logic!  Oh wait, what if you don’t have enough money in your account and then they automatically debit it?  Because that’s my whole f’n problem, i do not have money in my account!  My problem isn’t writing the checks, it’s with the money being in my account when motherf*ckers go to cash them.  So yeah unless someone is also automatically putting that money in my account before they take it out i will not be signing up for any automatic bill paying service….

“Facebook Etiquette”-

– Music is the perfect mood setter, whether it be for getting romantic with your lady or for adding another level of depression to when you’re crying while masturbating in the bath tub as you get ready to drop a plugged in radio into the water.

Which is why this next entry into The BEST Album Covers of ALL TIME!  is so unique, because not only does it help you do something that no one should ever want to do, it also asks the question we all want to know.  Which is how does this guy have one friend let alone SEVEN???  We may never know the answer to this question, but what we do know is that this album cover is TREMENDOUS.  So please enjoy The Night Pastor and Seven Friends with “Music to Lure Pigeons By”

– One of the keys to baseball is how well you run the bases.  But now Taco Bell will reward teams that run the bases the best by giving America the runs for free!  That’s right, if any player steals a base in the World Series Taco Bell will give America a free A.M. crunchwrap.  And if you don’t know what that is you are BLOWING it in life, because it’s a breakfast burrito wrapped with egg, sausage, cheese and a hash brown all IN the burrito!  So even if you hate baseball and want the Mets to lose like a dirty terrorist you still get to eat that disgusting goodness as long as someone steals a base!  This truly is America’s pastime!

And that’s it for me today kids! i hope everyone has a great week, but more importantly i hope the Mets have a great week and even better series,  So root for the Mets, root for some stolen bases for some free breakfast and i’ll see you kids here next week on Tuesday, with a new blog and hopefully with the Mets as your new World Series champs!

Cya Tuesday, @migueljose_85 on Twitter

And go “LIKE” my Here Comes the Money… Facebook page!



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: