Due to the recent derogatory statements by Donald Trump regarding immigrants, NBC Universal is ending its business relationship with Mr. Trump. – NBC

30 Jun

What is up kids?

i’ll tell you what’s up, because if you didn’t hear the news already pretty much IMMEDIATELY after i posted my last blog about Donald Trump being a racist bag of douche Univision and then NBC has severed all of their ties with this human lump of excrement. And while i normally don’t pat my back saying how money and awesome and sexy i am, i have to admit it feels GOOD to finally say those 2 words that i longed to say to this orange haired pubic hair on a urinal cake waste of sperm.  And no it’s not, “You’re Fired!”  Because i’m pretty sure he has that trademarked and he might sue me for saying it.

And no, those words aren’t F*CK YOU! or EAT $HIT! or DIE ALREADY! or SUCK MY BIG BROWN CO*K AND SWALLOW 1000’S OF THE ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS THAT WILL CROSS THE BORDER OF YOUR TONSILS AND REST IN YOUR BELLY BECAUSE OH YEAH BY THE WAY GAY MARRIAGE IS LEGAL NOW TOO!  Which let’s be honest, is more then two words.  But for real, did you hear this lunatic try to tell CNN he’s against gay marriage and only for “Traditional” marriage?  Because apparently “traditional” marriage means being on you third wife and marrying a girl who’s half the age of your first wife.  Which traditionally makes you a creepy rich old f*ck who can only pull that off because your “loyal” wife can’t wait to get half of your $hit.

So instead, let me give him my own patented two word saying, and it’s one that feels more prevalent now more then ever.  So from NBC, Univision, and yours truly, we’d all like to tell you Mr. Trump you dirt-eating piece of slime, you scum-sucking pig, you son of a motherless goat…

So yeah, sorry about all of the Donald Trump talk lately.  i don’t try to harp on things too much on my blog, especially two blogs in a row.  But like i said last week for some reason this whole Trump presidential “run” is a joke and that fact that it’s being taken seriously is really getting to me, especially because he’s the number two Republican running in the race in some polls! But that really says something about the state of the Republican party, don’t ya think?


– Don’t you hate people at work or at school that walk right  by you without saying “hi” or even acknowledging your existence?  And most times it’s in tight corners like a hallway, and you see this person every day and you walk by them and get ready to say hi or smile or just nod because why wouldn’t you when you realize that you are two people who out of the entire universe are walking right by each other at the same time and place in a planet full of billions of people?

Yet these self obsessed inconsiderate jerk offs have no problem just walking by and pretending that you don’t exist, and then you feel like the a$$hole who was just gonna say hi to not make getting in each other’s personal space awkward.  But you shouldn’t feel like an ahole, because f*ck these people for not being decent enough humans to just hi which is something that would make life a little better for everyone.  And if you’re reading this and you’re one of these dicks who think they’re too good to say hi when you walk by me it’s not too late to try and be a better person instead of someone who is ruining humanity!!

“OLD SCHOOL” NONSENSE – Is there ANYTHING more obnoxious on the planet then someone who smokes cigars?  Jeebus Tap Dancing Christmas, do you really need to shove that big fat smelly cancer factory in your mouth and ruin the area for everyone around you within a mile radius?  Unless you are in a cigar bar or your own smoke filled disgusting house by yourself, you should NEVER light up a cigar anywhere.  If only because there is the concept of “other people” who might actually hate the smell of horrific cigar smoke.  You know, the kind of people who hope you suck on that brown nicotine filled penis as the white sperm like smoke fills your belly with  swimmies of death.  i hope you enjoy the cancer creampie your lungs are getting while the rest of us who are smart enough empty out  those disgusting cigars and their awful tobacco and instead fill that blunt with Mary Jane the way God intended!

– So i’m not a big pasta eater.  “No, you’re not.  You’re a HUGE pasta eater you big fat f*ck!”  Haha okay that one was funny.  But for real, i’m Mexican and Dominican and i’ve just never been a big eater of pasta.  My family was more of a chicken and rice family rather then pasta.  And yeah i love a good penne and vodka, or a fettuccine alfredo which is like the Cinnabon of pastas.  And i also like Spaghetti and meatballs, wish is a dish i don’t eat too often but when i do i definitely dig it.

Although not anymore, especially after witnessing this next entry into The BEST Album Covers of ALL TIME! And if you like spaghetti it might not be the worst idea ever to not look at this cover, but if you have the spaghetti and meatballs to try and handle it i give to you Pat Cooper, “Spaghetti Sauce and Other Delights!”

Fast Food Tips – As i’m getting older i realize i can’t eat as much as i used to.  i’m about 80 pounds heavier and it looks like i eat as much as i used to, but the truth is i get full pretty quickly and i don’t need as much garbage fast food to shove down my disgusting throat, nor do i have the funds to afford to eat as much as i would like which is a sad amount.

Anyways, McDonalds must have heard my pathetic plea as they have just released their “Summer Menu”, which includes either a double cheeseburger, a filet o fish, a 6 pc nuggets, or a snack wrap, all coming with fries for a meager $2.50.  And i hate Monsanto and fast food as much as the next guy, but for $2.50 i’ll gladly throw away all of my principles for a cheap meal that will send me to an early grave!  Thanks McDonalds!

And that’s it for me today kids! i PROMISE that my next blog won’t be about how awful Donald Trump is and i’ll try to get back to more of my regular ha ha’s.  Unless something even better happens to him besides getting fired, like he has to leave the campaign trail after his wife leaves him and he gets a massive attack of diarrhea that keeps him confined to the toilet bowl for weeks on end on his end.

But have a great week, have an even better July 4th holiday, and i’ll see you kids back here next Tuesday for an all new blog!


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