All i can say is that my life is pretty plain, i like watchin’ the puddles gather rain. And all i can do is just pour some tea for two, and speak my point of view but it’s not sane. It’s not sane… – Shannon Hoon "No Rain"

24 Oct
What is up kids?

Man has this been a miserably awful rainy week or what?  i mean honestly, is there anything harder then getting up for work in the morning when it’s dark and cold and raining out?  Every inch of your soul just wants to crawl back into bed, get under the covers and go back to that dream where i’m fighting aliens with a machine gun on Mars with Kate Upton and Will Smith from “Men in Black” by my side while i’m wearing cowboy boots and a diaper for some reason.  And oh yeah, you’re welcome for that image!

But while it has been downright dreary and rainy these last few days  it is supposed to be really nice this weekend.  So i hope you all get to go out an enjoy it!  For real, most of us wait and hope and PRAY for the weekend to be here every second of Monday through Thursday.  So now that the weekend is FINALLY here it’s time to make the most of it! Seize the Carpe Diem!
And while i’m not sure exactly what my plans are for this weekend, i am positive that i’m going to have the best time ever.  Why do i know this you’re probably asking?  It’s because i’m always kind of having the best time ever in this life.  How could i not be?  i’m alive in the future!  i live in a time where anything i could ever want to buy can be purchased right from my computer and have it delivered to my house, as well as a time when i can look up ANYTHING i could possibly ever wonder and/or have questions about and find the answers right on my phone!  Not only that, every movie or song that i would ever want to watch or listen to is just a free download away, as long as you know the right website to go to or as long as you know a person who’s under 30 years old.  i’m telling ya kids, the future is here and now and it’s fantastic!  It’s just like they said in that song, the future’s so bright i gotta wear sunglasses!

Now don’t get me wrong, not everything is roses and sunshine for me all of the time.  At the same time that i’m super happy, i also feel like i’m constantly an anxiety filled mess trying to figure out how i’m going to pay my bills every week.  i mean just knowing the debt that i have with my credit cards and student loans is enough to make me cry sitting down in the fetal position in the shower as the missed calls from credit collectors fill my voice mail.  But whenever i start feeling like that too much i remember that life shouldn’t be all about money, and that even though it always feels like i’m living paycheck to paycheck and never catching up i also realize that’s how a lot of people seem to feel. 

And it’s not just poor schmucks like me, these people feel this way even when they are making a ton more money then i’ll ever make!  So if everyone always seems to feel like they never have enough money and/or they can’t catch up with bills and the price of living, then maybe that whole way of thinking is bull$hit to begin with, don’t ya think?  i mean yeah it’ll always suck to watch your paycheck go from your full net pay to zero on the day you get paid as you pay off your awful bills that never seem to end.  But instead of letting that horrendous feeling consume me the way it does so many other people, i’m going to realize that this way of thinking is useless and instead focus on all of the great things i have in my life, like my family, my girl, my health, and my future!  Well maybe not the health part…

And before i get to the nonsense, i guess i should admit now that i’m completely kidding with this entire rant.  No i don’t mean about me having the money life, i mean that we’re definitely not living in the future right now.  How could we be, we don’t even have hoverboards yet!  For real, what’s the point of being alive now if there aren’t hoverboards?  What are you going to tell me next, that the movie “Back to the Future” wasn’t historically accurate?  Let’s hook it up already scientists!


Speaking of Back to the Future, if you haven’t seen my review of it yet on “VHS Breakdown” or even if you’ve only seen it one or seven times you should watch it here NOW!
 – So i forgot to post this on my Tuesday blog, but lucky for me Rob was useful for the first time in his life and made sure to remind me that Monday was the anniversary of the day that Shannon Hoon died, the lead singer of the most underrated band of all time “Blind Melon.”  And i don’t say that with the least bit of exaggeration, because i know most people only know Blind Melon as a “one hit wonder” with the song, “No Rain.”  But what most people don’t realize is that Blind Melon is SO much better then just that one song, and that not only is their self titled debut album incredible in itself, their second album “Soup” is in my top 5 favorite albums OF ALL TIME!

 But more importantly then all of that is the fact that Shannon Hoon was just an amazing and incredibly likeable guy who unfortunately had a terrible problem with cocaine and heroin.  And yeah i know it’s easy to get on your high horse and judge him and say he was a dirtbag loser drug addict, but that’s what all people who don’t understand drugs like to do.  And don’t get me wrong, there is NEVER an excuse to do heroin.  But the mere fact that someone does it isn’t enough to make them deserve to die, and the fact that we lost Shannon is tragic.  i mean yeah it’s all his fault and he definitely blew it, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t missed and that his life touched people’s hearts forever.  So rest in Peace Shannon, you are ridiculously missed!

– So i don’t normally post funny memes or pics without trying to make it relevant to something else on my blog, but i saw this the other day and i can’t stop laughing so i hope you can’t either!
A Great Name for a Punk Band!  “The Horsefeathers”

“OLD SCHOOL” NONSENSE – i think the word “tween” is really hot.  i didn’t think it was possible to make the word TEEN any hotter but apparently they’ve done it.  I”m not positive but i’m pretty sure it means “Twenty-something teen”, or at least that’s what i plan to tell the cops when they come get me.  Speaking of cops, just because a website advertises “Barely legal Tweens”, it’s actually 100%, NOT legal…

Fast Food Tips – So i always thought the KFC Double Down was basically the perfect fast food invention.  i mean a bacon and cheese sandwich with two boneless fried chicken pieces as the bread that holds it all together?  What could be more perfect then that?

Well apparently Korea has figured out how to make that sandwich better the same way someone figured out how to make the word “teen” even hotter, as they have just introduced the “Zinger Double Down King,” a monstrosity that is sure to clog your arteries and colon before stopping your heart and ending your life for good in the most delicious way possible.  And it’s not that i want to die on the toilet bowl, but after seeing a picture of this delicious diarrhea delight it might be worth it to die.  Because what this sandwich does is add an all beef burger patty to the existing Double Down sandwich to make sure that if you didn’t have diabetes before that you will now!  And i’d like to say that my mouth isn’t watering at the thought of this and that i didn’t have to change my underwear after looking at a picture of this beautiful masterpiece.  i’d like to say that stuff didnt’ happen.  But the truth is i’m standing here with saliva on my chin and a fresh new pair of boxers and now i’m wondering if Groupon has any good deals on flights to Korea!  Although before i get on a plane, nothing bad ever goes on in that country ever, right?

And that’s it for me today kids!  Hopefully this blog inspired you to go out to dinner, or a happy hour, or a movie, or do ANYTHING fun this weekend.  But if not i hope you have fun just sitting on your couch as well, because as long as you’re enjoying yourself and not hurting anyone i’ve gots none problem with what you do.

But i’m ready to go out and have fun as soon as i get out of work, so hopefully i will see you all there too!

Cya Tuesday with an all new blog!  @migueljose_85 on Twitter

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