I am driven by two main philosophies: Know more about the world then i did yesterday, and lessen the suffering of others. You’d be surprised with how far that gets you. – Neil DeGrasse Tyson

11 Mar

What is up kids?

i’ll tell you what’s up, sometimes it’s really tough to handle how f’n CRAZY this life is.  Do you guys ever stop and think about that?  How f’n bat$hit crazy our lives on this beautiful little blue green ball that floats around the sun actually are??  No???  You probably need to do more drugs then.  Legal drugs, illegal drugs, pills, caffeine, glade hits, i don’t care what it is but you should probably be doing SOMETHING…

Because sometimes it’s hard to take all this life $hit serious folks.  Paying your bills, trying to buy a house, finding the money for that wedding, figuring out how to be a parent, studying for classes and purchasing a new car or adopting a puppy.  All of these “important” things we do alone or together as a society as we constantly follow all of the laws that people have decided we’re supposed to follow, the entire process is NUT BALLS!

And i don’t even mean real laws like “don’t kill people” and “don’t rob banks.”  i mean simple stuff like wearing clothes, and paying attention to traffic signs and/or lights when we drive.  Or caring so much about whose name it is on the label of clothes we’re wearing or the brand of television we want to buy.  Or even who’s President or King of a country, or star of a hit movie or even quarterback of a professional football team.  All of these things i just listed above are rules and laws and labels that we live by, yet when it comes down to it all of that is NONSENSE!  At least in the big scheme of things.

Take this new show “Cosmos” starring Neil DeGrasse Tyson, who is one of the smartest people on the planet.  If you haven’t heard about his new show “Cosmos” then you owe it to yourself to look it up and start DVR’ing it immediately.  It’s a scientific and factual look at everything in our universe from creation until now, and it was created by the genius of Neil and co-creator Seth MacFarlane the guy behind “Family Guy.”  Yep, that Seth MacFarlane.

Anyways, Peter Griffin isn’t in the show at all, but good for Seth for backing science and helping to get more knowledge out to the people on this planet.  Most people want to do the opposite, they want to try and get you to stop caring about the poor, or caring about your neighbors, and try to get you scared of everything and everybody and convince you that you need an automatic gun to protect yourself despite what any “facts” or “stats” say about people who own guns.  There’s a LOT of money spent trying to keep all of us ignorant and in the dark, but lucky for us we have people like Neil DeGrasse Tyson to try and enlighten us to the wonders of the world.  And people like Bill Nye the Science Guy who also has wonderful words of advice for us all!

And for the record the idea for this show wasn’t Neil’s, it was his mentor and friend in science Carl Sagan, who was the original host of “Cosmos” back in 1980.  His genius helped inspire Tyson’s, and if you google him or wikipedia him you will read about his amazing life and see a ton of other inspiring quotes such as the one i’m putting below:

It’s nice to hear things like that, especially with all of the bull$hit that is out there. From Republicans who try to deny a woman’s reproductive rights in Texas, to the people who want to build that Keystone pipeline and ruin even more of our beautiful country, to the states that STILL don’t have laws protecting an LGBT employee in the workplace and homosexuals are still able to be fired without reason even now in 2014.  A lot of times it seems like the battle for “Good” is a losing one, and it’s easy to get discouraged.

But the popularity of the show “Cosmos” and the incredible ratings it received despite going up against “The Walking Dead” and “True Detective” shows that there is a thirst of knowledge that people have that wants to be quenched, and not everybody wants to watch “Reality” television and pointless awfulness.  Some of us do realize we’re just a grain of sand in the vast desert that is time and space, and that learning about ourselves and our Earth is the best way to make sure that our short time on this gorgeous rock floating through space is spent achieving as much love and happiness with each other as possible.  Because that is REALLY all that matters, all of this other stuff is just random nonsense.


So there’s no way to explain it, but out of all of the episodes from Season One of “VHS Breakdown” it is the one shown below that is BY FAR our highest viewed.  Over THREE THOUSAND views on YouTube?  Holy $hitballs i only have like 4 friends and 5 family members so the rest of those views must be actual fans!

If you ask Rob he’ll say this is our most popular one because it’s the greatest movie of all time.  And with over 3K views of this episode i guess i don’t have any argument against him…

“Facebook Etiquette”- Did you all hear about the girl who lost her dad’s discrimination lawsuit by posting about it on Facebook?  Apparently her dad won 80 grand in a lawsuit with his former employer, with the conditions being that he not tell anyone about the case or talk about it publicly. Unfortunately he never told this to his darling baby girl who posted this on Facebook:

“Mama and Papa Snay won the case against Gulliver,” 

she wrote. “Gulliver is now officially paying for my 

vacation to Europe this summer. SUCK IT.”

WHOOPS!!  Sorry kiddo, it looks like your trip has now been canceled since you had to brag about it on Facebook.  And i don’t know how you make it up to your dad after losing him $80,000 but the first thing you might want to do is never post on social media again.  But in this girls defense she is just a kid, and kids just don’t get it.  But she also has an “Always Sunny in Philadelphia” poster in her room and she did drop a “SUCK IT” which i find hilarious, so it’s not like what she did was all bad.  In fact i hope you find a way to go on that trip honey!  Good luck! 
“OLD SCHOOL” NONSENSE- Who designed martini glasses? i’m guessing pretentious a$$holes.  Don’t get me wrong, there ain’t nothing wrong with getting down and dirty with a dirty.  But these glasses are shaped so that it’s basically impossible to do anything but sit there and drink slowly unless you want to pour half that $12 drink all over the place.  Oh so now i get it, they give you that kind of glass so that if you spill it and have to order more of them.  So they really ARE designed by a$$holes!  It makes much more sense to me now.  Carry on.
And that’s it for me today kids!  i gotta keep it short and sweet because we’re filming the next episode of “VHS Breakdown: Season DOS!” today and i gotta get ready.  i’m so f*cking excited for you guys to see this new season!  It’s so much f’n better and funnier and bigger then season one, i’m almost popping in my pants with excitement that it’s less then 10 days away!!!
But i hope you all have a great week, enjoy the beautiful weather today and i’ll see you back here on Friday with an all new blog!!

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