I have spent my whole life scared, frightened of things that could happen, might happen, might not happen. 50 years I spent like that. Finding myself awake at three in the morning. But you know what? Ever since my diagnosis, I sleep just fine. What I came to realize is that fear, that’s the worst of it. That’s the real enemy. So, get up, get out in the real world and you kick that bastard as hard you can right in the teeth. -Walter White

27 Sep
THE BLOG ABOUT DEXTER, BREAKING BAD, AND FINALES IN GENERAL

What is up kids?

i’ll tell you what’s up, these 250 blogs i have written have me EXHAUSTED.  And i feel like it’s been a hot one since i’ve taken any time off so i believe that’s what i’m going to do next week.  That’s right, i’m going to take a week off from this blog to recharge and get some other stuff done. So you can consider today’s blog my “Season Finale!”

Although speaking of finales, did everyone catch the “Dexter” series finale last weekend?  First of all i bet you didn’t get to see it in style like i did, as i got to watch it at the house of the great Aquarian Weekly writer Amanda Batista who has done interviews with suck high profile bands and names such as Green Day, Korn, and Anthony Jeslenik.  So not only is she a fantastic writer that you can read here on The Aquarian Website, but her and her sister (who i also happen to date) made a bunch of incredible food which was perfect because i was starving and i ate my face off!  Oh and did i mention that there were cupcakes made with “Cookie Butter” frosting?  If i didn’t mention that i should have, because Cookie Butter is currently the greatest food on the planet.  In fact, as soon as i ate a few of those cupcakes i had my own personal series finale in my pants…

But frosting the front of my jeans with my own personal cookie butter wasn’t the only thing i did during the last episode of Dexter.  i’ve also come to the realization that NOBODY is ever happy with a series finale. EVER.  And to be honest i think it is a custom that has become a little unfair, because most people just expect too much out of these shows and in reality no finale would ever make them happy.  How could it?  People get legitimately hurt when having to say goodbye to these characters that people have known and loved for years and years and seasons and seasons. No one really wants to say goodbye to them, so just the fact that the show tries to do it is a recipe for disappointment.

And that’s what happened with Dexter, or at least that was how all of social media reacted after the series finale.  Everybody HATED it or thought it had SUCKED, and everyone couldn’t wait to post how they felt on Twitter and on Facebook!  i literally saw a bunch of articles comparing the Dexter finale to the last episode of “Seinfeld,” another show that everybody loved and hated to see go so they took it out on the finale. Do people honestly realize how impossible it is to write a final episode and say goodbye to characters that people actually consider part of their lives?   Of course they don’t.  These people don’t create anything, all they do is watch and judge which eventually leads them to go online and bash these amazing pieces of work.

But it is TOUGH to end a series kids.  And the better the series, the tougher the ending.  Honestly, can any of you name off of the top of your head a series finale that you actually liked?  i can name a bunch, mostly because i’m not as harsh a critic as most of America at least when it comes to show finales.  But for the most part finales are never satisfying, and to me that is just because it’s so hard to say goodbye…

So it’ll be interesting to see what happens with this “Breaking Bad” finale this Sunday, because as you all probably know this is pretty much considered the greatest show of all time.  And as much as i love to disagree with all of America as much as possible, for once i have to admit she is right, this is the greatest show of all time.  And the funny thing is i actually do think people will be happy with the ending.  Well maybe not happy, a show as ruthless as this will certainly not have a happy ending.  It’s called “Breaking BAD” for crying out loud!

But if i had to guess this show’s ending is going to be the most memorable one of all time, and while it’ll probably be very sad to watch i have a feeling that when it’s all over we will all be having a very happy ending in our pants.  And that’s what television is all about, isn’t it???

RANDOM NONSENSE

-So did you crackers realize that it’s “Hispanic Heritage Month?!?”  Probably not, because you’re too busy being white. Unless of course that’s the reason you are reading my blog today, and that is so you could pay homage to all of Hispanic culture by reading your favorite Mexican/Dominican blogger.  And if that’s why you are reading my blog thank you so much!!  i truly appreciate the honor of being your connection to the Latino World!  And to the rest of you who didn’t realize it was Hispanic Heritage month, shame on you!  The only way to make up for this is to watch this new Season Two teaser of “VHS Breakdown” and like the video and/or make a comment!  It’s the least you could do for my people…

Season Two trailer for VHS BREAKDOWN!!!

A Great Name for a Punk Band! “The Do Hickeys”

The Guy Who F*CKED Me In Fantasy Football This Week… Wes Welker and Matt Prater can lick my butthole.  GdDAMN these fools for ruining my fantasy week!  And yes i’m also heated at CJ Spiller for being absolute garbage this year when i took him extremely high in two leagues.  But Welker and Prater were the ones who whooped my ass Monday night to make me lose so both of them can just suck it.  Not that i’m still heated about it and i want to kill everyone, and especially want to punch Steven in the face for being down 6 points to me and both of us have kickers going and his kicker scores 17 points to beat me Monday night.  i’m not still heated about that even though that happened four days ago and i still want to punch someone in the face.  Nope, not at all.

“OLD SCHOOL” NONSENSE- How come some people are such cotton pansies?  Have you ever met these people?  You know, the ones who absolutely FREAK OUT if you put cotton anywhere near them.  What is there f’n problem?  Is there anything more soft and/or less threatening then cotton?  And apparently these people have no problem wearing cotton, it’s just when it’s in it’s “natural” state that they totally lose their $hit.  Like God forbid you throw a cotton ball at them, you might as well punch them in the face while you’re at it you’ll get the same reaction.  Do they realize it’s not alive and that it’s super soft and fluffy?  i know there are ton of you out there like this but whatever you people who don’t like cotton are weirdos.  Unless you were a slave back in the day, then i could where that hatred comes from.  But you honkeys need to find some real fears already!  The ones you come up with are awful.

“OLD SCHOOL” NONSENSE DOS- There is nothing more depressing then when you go into a Hooters restaurant and get stuck with an ugly waitress.  Ugh, it’s the WORST.  It’s not like i go everyday or anything, because let’s be honest the draft beer gives me liquid deuces in a bad way and their wings aren’t that good at all.  But if my options are having a waitress with nice cleavage and tiny shorts serving me awful food and drink, or a waitress in some dumb polo with zero cleavage serving me good food i’ll take the cleavage any day of the week.

But getting your seat at Hooters is a really tough choice, and when you blow it that will ruin your entire experience.  Nothing is worse then sitting with your brunette waitress with the saggy a$$ and B-Cups while you watch the hot blonde who looks like Kate Upton laughing and serving the table next to you.  So choose your seat at Hooters wisely kids, one wrong choice and that horrific dump of flat Coors light beer and 3 mile island sauce that you take later just won’t be worth it.

Speaking of Kate Upton, did all of you video game nerds realize that she’s in the new GTAV?  The makers of the game say it isn’t her but my guess is that they are lying sacks of $hit…

Fast Food Tips – So for some reason McDonalds now offers buffalo wings and for some reason they call them “Mighty wings.”  And no, they are not over sized McNuggets.  They are actual wings on bone that you can get at McDonald’s now.  And i don’t know who wants to get wings at McDonalds when you could go to Hooters on a Monday night and get all you can eat wings and hopefully look at boobies instead of going into a depressing McDonalds, but if you are that type of person i hope you enjoy them with their McNugget sauces because if you don’t do that my guess is you are BLOWING it!!  But i’m guessing you knew that already…

And that’s it for me today kids!  i hope you have a fantastic weekend and an even better week while i’m gone!  i’ll be back here Tuesday, October 8th with an all new blog so i hope to see you all here back then.

But until that time have a great weekend, a great week, and don’t forget to go follow my show “VHS Breakdown” on Blip.tv if you’re excited about our second season which you should be!!!

Cya on Tuesday, 10/8!  @migueljose_85 on Twitter


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