The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. – Dr. Martin Luther King Jr

17 Jan

What is up kids?

MAN i feel good today, dare i say great!  It’s a beautiful day to be alive my friends, sometimes it’s a good thing to remember that.  i don’t know how i’ll feel when i post this because i’ll be at work but at this particular moment in time i am doing straight money.

And none need for a long rant right now, especially when my Random Nonsense is f’n FANTASTIC today.  Go ahead and doubt me, people doubted the Giants last weekend too.  Is everyone still high off of that win?  i know i sure am.  That win and weed.  No! i don’t smoke anymore!  That’s my story your honor and i’m sticking to it!

So did everyone have off for Martin Luther King Jr Day yesterday?  You should have, or your company is racist. Did you ever stop and read any of his quotes?  Not so much the “I have a dream” speech because you’ve probably heard some of that.  At least on the commercials they played on every station and channel yesterday that’s for sure.  They always use that speech, which of course is the moneyest ever don’t get me wrong.  But man if you ever take the time to really read what Martin Luther King Jr was about it is really amazing the message that man preached.  i especially like the quote, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that.  Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.”  That sounds like the stuff my guy Jesus used to preach, and if that’s the role model you are following you must be a decent human being.  If you need anymore proof just look at what happened to both these men, they were killed by people who weren’t ready for a message of love.  The crazy thing is both of them would probably forgive the people who killed them which makes them better men than I that’s for sure.  “Is is just that or is it because they spent their lives believing and fighting for a cause and all you do is barely make us chuckle twice a week?”  Yes it is both those things.

Anyways i know normally people don’t pay attention to holidays, they are just happy to have the day off and leave it at that.  But next time you are bored and no one is doing anything on Facebook and a new blog isn’t up yet and you’ve read all the yahoo news stories why not Wikipedia Martin Luther King Jr just for the fun of it?  Trust me, i know learning new things sucks ass but sometimes getting your learn on isn’t such a bad thing, and in MLK’s case you might be surprised at what you didn’t know.  Or you can forget i ever tell you anything and just read my jokes and get nothing more out of this blog.  Do what you want i’m not your parents!


-Do all of you know what catnip is?  Maybe you don’t, i mean i know i just found out.  And do all of you know how much i hate cats?  i f’n HATE them, with a passion.  There has only been one ever that i like and it’s because it’s a kitten and apparently kittens aren’t the worst.  She’s actually kind of fun, but gddamn it i hate to admit it.  Anyways i’m learning all these things about cats and one of them is they LOVE f’n catnip.  It’s like kitty crack for them, no joke.  Seriously, it’s like heroin, crack and cocaine all rolled into one.  And it looks like weed, that’s the funny part. It looks like a bag of weed.  Anyways they don’t even eat it or nothing it just drives them f’n nuts, it’s pretty funny to watch.  And oh yeah did you know when a cat gives birth they can give birth from up to 1 to 8 kittens in a litter, and they can have 2-3 litters per year?  And that just born kittens are called cubs not kittens?  And did you know i still f’n hate cats?  Okay then.

Fast food tips- These tips are normally for the eaters of Fast Food not so much for the restaurant themselves but here’s a tip to Papa John’s employees.  If you’re going to call the customer “lady Chinky eyes” just don’t print it on the receipt, that’s just wrong.  i mean yeah we all know you’re thinking it and saying it behind the counter and possibly to your friends after work.  But to put it on the receipt?  That is just raw kid, no joke.

The Money $hot-out of the Week- Did you see that George Clooney movie “The Descendants” won all those Golden Globes awards?  Man that Clooney is an amazing man.  His performance in “Syriana” in 2005 gave him a long awaited Best Supporting Actor in the Academy awards, and his nomination for best actor for “Michael Clayton” and “Up in the Air” are proof that this man is an acting genius.  He deservedly won the Golden Globe this year, and we can only hope he goes on to win the Academy award as well.  That is why without zero doubt this week’s Money $hot-out of the Week is Stacy Keibler, of course.  Is there any doubt that ever since she decided to date George Clooney his career has taken off?  What would normally be a boring little drama became an Oscar caliber film once he started dating her.  i would also like to congratulate Stacy on being the first TWO-TIME winner of the Shout OUT OF THE WEEK award.  Any of you previous winners i tell you now, the bar has been raised!  As does my friend in my shorts every time he sees a picture of Stacy…

“Facebook etiquette”- Hey people who have off from work when i don’t on a holiday, stop bragging about it on Facebook!  “So enjoying this day off!'”  Really? Cause i’m the phone with some jerk0ff complaining about $hit that happened two years ago but needs an answer now and of course that douchebag who normally helps me out was smart enough to call out so i have to speak to his $hitty people as well.  Thanks deek!  Anyways you people who brag about having off from work are the same aholes who complain when they come back to work after a long vacation.  Really?  It’s hard to come back after a week at the beach living in paradise?  Because i have to come to work after freezing my ass off for two miserably quick days before coming back to this awful job, maybe you shouldn’t complain so much.  And maybe you shouldn’t brag about days off that i don’t get!

LATER DICKS! Well Pack, you had a nice run.  But even with the officials on your side you just could not with stand the wrath that Big Blue brang into Green Bay last Sunday.  And yes all my “Words with Friends” nerds i know brang is not a word.  This is my blog, not an essay for English class.   But as Green Bay found out there is nothing tougher then repeating as champion.  And there is also nothing tougher then the Big Blue’s defense which was the MONEY.  And yeah yeah a few fools dropped some balls, but having 4 of the best defensive lineman coming at you all game had to have a little something to do with Aaron Rogers being caught up.  But yeah i said i hoped they would be the first ones of the year and my dream came true so LATER DICKS!to the Green Bay Packers.  You’re an incredible team who had a fantastic two year run.  Now get out of my playoffs already!  San Francisco you are  next…

That’s it for me today kids. i am back to normal with Dos blogs per week so i will see you fools again on Friday. i think Friday’s rant will be a pretty funny story so you will want to stay tuned for that!

-miguel jo$é

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