If you’re not as educated or informed, what you do is start your own party and you yell the loudest.- Charlie "It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia"

1 Nov

What is up kids?

MAN did we get douched by that storm!  Motherf’er, if there is one thing that could stop a nice fun party with hot girls dressed in slutty costumes it’s a snow storm in October. Stupid Mother Nature and climate change or global warming.  Thanks Al Gore!  And it’s good the storm happened Saturday night, because that’s when the party was.  Definitely don’t happen during the week when we could all get out of work, or don’t even happen on Sunday when i gots zero plans except for sitting inside watching football all day.  Thanks life.

Oh well, i didn’t lose power at least so i shouldn’t complain too much.  That is definitely way worse then what I had to deal with.  Can we just be in the future already where we never have to worry about losing power and/or water or heat ever?  Or are things still going to be super ghetto in the future as well? My guess is super ghetto, we don’t even have flying cars yet!  Grow up scientists, do SOMETHING already!  Cure a disease, find an alternative energy to oil or at the very least legalize marijuana.  Alright fine they might not have too much influence on that last part, but they could at least use “science” to say that weed isn’t harmful to our bodies and that it should be legal.  Scientists can do that, right?  If not what the F are they good for!  Nothing, that’s what.

But back to this ghetto weather, does anyone else remember “seasons” growing up? i feel like we used to have at least 3 of them, possibly even 5 when i was a kid.  Call me crazy, but as a kid i remember in the winter it would get really cold and possibly snow sometimes.  Then in the spring it would start to warm up again.  Then the summer would come and it’d be CRAZY hot, or at least until the Fall came and it cooled down and leaves would fall until it became winter again.  Remember that nonsense?  At this point i guess i don’t either.  Summer was literally a little more then a month ago but today thousands of people don’t have power because of a snow storm.  Are there really people who still don’t believe in climate change?  Billions of people on this earth, all of them using resources and many of them involved in heavy machinery and industry and you honestly don’t think we have any affect on this planet?  Yeah i guess that makes sense, it must just be the Democrats and their “liberal” agenda and all their propaganda.  i’ll blame that instead of just looking outside my f*cking window and seeing what’s happening to my planet with my own eyeballs.

Haha is this a rant about climate change?  No not really, but i did throw a few nuggets of truth in there.  “But how are we going to distinguish those between your nuggets of $hit?”  Not my problem jerkweed, i just write the blogs it’s your job to not enjoy them.  And speaking of not enjoying my blog some of you “strangers” who read but aren’t followers f’n follow my blog already!  i can come up with and plagiarize enough material to put out two blogs for your “enjoyment” each week, you can take 5 seconds to become a follower!  Alright fine like 5 minutes but still, do it!  And thanks for Harrison to pushing my garbage, i appreciate the shout outs big guy!  Enjoy the Random Nonsense and awful grammar ya jerk!

RANDOM NONSENSE

-i throw a decent amount of parties, or at least i did when i used to have friends.  But i must say the all-time WORST question that i constantly get is “So who’s going to the party?”  EVERYONE asks that question, and i guess i don’t blame them.  i mean it’s a decent enough question to ask because of course you want to know who’s going.  But no one ever stops to think that the person getting asked that question has to answer it EVERY F’N TIME.  And do you realize i have to literally sit there and list every gddamn name of every single person going?  It’s so f’n annoying, and who do you really expect is gonna be there? It’s always the same bunch of a$$holes it always is, do you really think if someone crazy was showing up i wouldn’t bother mentioning it to you?  “So who’s coming to the party?”  Well Tom will be there, Steve, Lisa, and oh yeah Kanye West, Kim Kardashian and Mark Zuckerberg are gonna be there!  “REALLY?!?!?” No  not really jerk0ff it’s me and my dumbass friends.  Stop worrying so much about who’s gonna be there and and just be glad there’s a party and come ready to have a good time for crying out loud.  Oh and if you’re a dude bring beer, you’re lucky i invited your non-bringing any girls ass in the first place.

-Do you ever see cars or trucks that have a snow plow up front driving around during a snow storm not plowing?  What the F is with that??  You have a plow, it’s f’n snowing, f’n plow!!!  Or how bout this, if you don’t want to plow then don’t drive around with a plow on your truck!  i don’t get it, it’d be like people driving around in a fire truck not putting out fires.  Thanks dicks!  And some of you probably either plow streets or know someone who plows and have an actual answer for me. “Well technically, it’s against the law to plow without the proper permit and…” Shut it ahole, how about instead of explaining bull$hit laws to me you grab a shovel and start helping with this stupid snow!

Guy who f*cked me in fantasy football this week… Well to be honest it’s actually… Nobody!  That’s right kids, your humble narrator went 3-0 this week so for once i did all the f*cking.  And i f*cked em good and hard, and it felt awesome.  Plus in the league i run called the “Dungeon” i scored the highest points EVER in the league!  Suck on that jerks!  And yeah you could bring up the point that even with that win i am now only 2-6, and yeah the league has only been around 2 years, and yeah i didn’t make the playoffs last year and probably won’t this year.  But year to year there will be a different champion, but only one guy can score the highest points ever.  And who is that? This motherf’er that’s who.  Whoops

Fast food tips- Continuing with my trend of fast food items you can’t get anywhere, i have to say i’m very curious to try the McLobster.  “Wait, McDonalds sells lobster??” Wow, i am literally right in the middle of explaining this and you have to interrupt with an dumbass idiotic question when i’m obviously about to explain it?  Anyways, all it is hot dog bun filled with “lobster” meat and shredded lettuce covered in Mclobster sauce.  “Why did you put quotes on lobster when “meat” should also be in quotes considering how shady McDonald’s meat is?”  Well played my friend, it’s nice to have you back in the game.  But anyways this is a real thing and i want it so if anyone hears about it anywhere let me know!

“Facebook etiquette”- There should be an option on Facebook where it automatically posts “Happy Birthday!” on people’s birthday’s for you, this way you never miss it.  i mean some days you just don’t go on Facebook, like when you’re not at work, on vacation, or have a life.  Should it be my fault that you had a birthday on the day i was at that wedding?  i didn’t even go on Facebook, how else am i gonna know it’s your birthday?  By remembering?  So yeah hook it up Facebook, next time you do one of those God awful “updates” make sure you hook that option up already!  Patent pending…

That’s it for me kids, hopefully you all have power and are enjoying my genius.  If not it definitely sucks to be you, especially while i’m home from work enjoying a nice day off.  But hopefully you got a little chuckle or 2 reading this, and if you didn’t you’re a miserable prick and should get back to work already.  Oh but before you do follow my blog already for the love of God!

Cya Friday…. miguel jo$e

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4 Responses to “If you’re not as educated or informed, what you do is start your own party and you yell the loudest.- Charlie "It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia"”

  1. Anonymous November 1, 2011 at 4:38 pm #

    they sell the McLobsters up in New England.. usually only during the summer/fall.

    Like

  2. Anonymous November 1, 2011 at 6:53 pm #

    this is ray

    hi harry, nice job blocking me on facebook, who's comments am i going to like now.

    migs – well done homie

    Like

  3. Anonymous November 4, 2011 at 6:16 pm #

    Ewwww the McLobster just sounds nasty.

    But I 100% loved the part about who's gonna be at the party. I ask everyone that question and everyone always gets pissed. Just type the answer in a text and then copy and paste it to everyone who asks…problem solved =)

    Like

  4. Anonymous November 4, 2011 at 6:17 pm #

    that comment is from Stef =)

    Like

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