Why can’t you support my gibberish? i’d do it if you were stupid. – Homer Simpson

11 Oct

What is up kids?

Haha alright i won’t even pretend like this is the format i’m going to use going forward, but the site looks crazy right?  It was definitely mad fun to pick out and there is definitely some wacky nonsense going on. i would say my advice would be to smoke a big fat bizzowl and then check out my site again today, but that’s kinda always my advice on everything…

So do people still not believe in Climate change?  That’s Global warming for those of you not caught up on the newest PC term for what’s happening to our planet.  i know i remember growing up with that warm 80 degree October weather as we layed out on the beach and took in some rays hoping for a cool breeze that never comes.  Lying on my blanket, wondering what i was going to eat at the barbeque and…

Wait, i don’t remember that $hit, October was always freezing at balls!  Now that i think about it, when i think of my childhood i actually remember these things called “seasons.”  Does anyone else remember that?  i am not positive but i believe there were 3 or 4 of them, varying from cold to hot.  The good thing was for a few months in a row you kinda had an idea what the weather would be like.  “Hey it’s October, guess i should get my light jacket out!”  Now who knows what the F is going on, i guess they call this an “Indian Summer” but how does that help me out if i don’t if we’re talking Indian’s with a feather or a dot?

Was that last joke racist?  Eh, probably, i’m sure some Indian could read that and  be offended.  And i know some people who hate Indians who are probably still laughing at that joke.  Can’t please them all folks. And for real, unless you sent me an email saying how it was wrong how i bash Mexicans that one time (and by one time i mean every single blog) don’t bother getting all PC on me now.  And PC means politically correct, not that awful system people use when they are too poor to own a MAC.

Anyways despite the fact that most of the people in the scientific community believe in global warming, and despite the fact that it must be true because religious fanatic republicans don’t believe in it, i feel like it’s pretty ignorant to think that mankind has ZERO effect on this planet.  There are f’ing BILLIONS of people on this planet, there’s over 6 billion in this country alone.  And with all those people using energy and driving their cars and flying in planes and heating their homes, there are people out there that think this has zero effect on the planet?  Because yeah that makes sense.  Let’s ignore the polar caps melting and the fact that we don’t have 4 seasons anymore and it’s really just three extreme ones or the fact that i layed outside to get a tan on October 9th and that all the weather around the world from Tsunamis and earthquakes and hurricanes are just getting bigger and badder.  We should ignore all that and just remember we as humans are totally innocent!  We should never change one thing we do and “caring” about our planet is just a big money scam from the Left to put regulations on everything and stop big business!

There are people who honestly feel like that, some of them are even my close friends.  Good think i don’t try to judge people for their awful opinions and ideas because i would start to find my life a lonely place.  And trust me, even if the world does come to an end and nature starts putting a whooping on the Earth with hail storms and volcanoes and floods and devastation, i have no doubts these same people will still be shouting as the tidal waves crash upon their house “this is not our fault!” and still truly believe it.  They say ignorance is bliss but i’d rather be an aware individual with concerns then a blissful idiot who believes in a false ideology.  Most people seem to just like the bliss though, and i guess it’s hard to blame them.  But i’d rather get my bliss from a substance then by blocking any knowledge from getting into my dome.  But that’s just me guel i guess.


-Isn’t everybody allergic to cats?  Everytime there’s a cat around most normal people start sneezing and their eyes water because cats are the devil and they have that fur that irritates your senses for a reason, it’s just a warning sign that these animals are ones we are supposed to stay away from.  But people get them anyway, mostly because they either have no friends or don’t want them over their house because NOTHING is worse then going over a cat owners house.  Why don’t you just get some Poison ivy plants while you’re at it? Since apparently making it impossible to breathe and/or be comfortable in your home is something you are aiming for.

-Why do gay guys love girls with big boobs?  i’ve noticed that any gay guy i know, and trust me, that is a LOT of them, they always associate with at least one girl who is pushing at least DD status.  And it’s weird because they obviously don’t get a rise in their pants over them, they are just fascinated by them and love playing with them.  Which really makes them no different then any other guy, except for the fact that they are also into disgusting hairy man ass.  Which is a pretty big difference i guess. 

-So for some unGodly reason i caught 5 mins of that show “The Sing Off” last night.  Some of you may be surprised to be reading this, not because i’m admitting i saw any of that horrific show but because after watching it i didn’t put a bullet in my skull and end the pain and instead i am still able to write my blog today.  If you’ve never seen the show just imagine American Idol but not produced nearly as well and with way less talent and uglier people and more awfulness.  And if you’ve never seen American Idol you are a great human being and i envy everything about your life.  Except that you missed David Archuletta who has the voice of an angel.

Fast food tips- Super Egg bagels are the f’n MONEY.  If you don’t know what those are it’s an everything bagel but instead of a plain everything bagel it’s an egg bagel that’s an everything bagel combining my two favorite bagels.  i don’t know how long these have been around but a few new places by me have them and let’s just say i’m so happy about this new bagel that that’s not cream cheese on top…

i mean of course it’s not because i prefer butter.  What did you think i meant? My readers are some sick f*cks.

LATER DICKS!- ESPN has decided they will no longer use the Hank Williams jr song used for Monday Night Football, and in turn he has been fired from the company.  This was in response to this redneck ahole comparing our President to Hitler, which apparently some people weren’t a fan of.  This decision has caused a huge amount of controversy.  Not so much for his comments, but for me for wondering why the NFL continued to use this cheezy outdated dumb ass song from a uneducated racist who has never been relevant to anything ever for Monday night football year after year.  He also called out Fox’s morning show “Fox n’ Friends” for using gotcha journalism and twisting his words around, which is odd because it was a live on-air interview in it’s entirety.  And has anyone seen the morons who host Fox n’ Friends?  Those are the idiots he are claming that tricked him?? That would be like saying someone was mad at Djais in Belmar because you were outsmarted by Snooki.  But anyways yeah to Hank Williams jr… Later Dick!

Alright that’s it for me, i just sneezed while drinking coffee and spilled it on my shirt while i’m at work.  Because that’s awesome!  Good thing i don’t have a job where i care what i look like, even though i do look pretty money everyday.  But yeah i hope everyone’s day is better then mine and you enjoyed the layout for today.  i won’t promise that Friday’s will be the new look going forward but there will definitely be a new look that’s for sure.  Will it be the new one?  i guess we will find out…

-miguel jo$é


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