You know what I’m sick and tired of, Harry? I’m sick and tired of having to eek my way through life. I’m sick and tired of bein’ a nobody. But most of all, I’m sick and tired of havin’ nobody. – Lloyd, "Dumb and Dumber"

16 Sep

What is up kids?

That’s the quote i use from the funniest movie ever?  Normally i don’t start my Friday blogs with depressing quotes that make you want to climb into your car while it’s in your garage and take a carbon monoxide nap but oh well i just did it.  i can’t help it though, i’m pretty rattled these days.  Which is awesome because my blogs are always WAY funnier when i’m in an awful mood, except for the opposite.

idk, awful mood probably isnt the right way to explain it but it ain’t great.  i’m just so confused on so many things about life in general.  i know, i know, no one f’n cares.  But get a blog and write whatever you want and i’ll leave you alone about it i promise.  “Write whatever you want dick!  i’m already reading Random Nonsense instead of your bitch fest!”  God i hate you.

Maybe it’s ingrained in me after 47 years of going to school but once September rolls around i feel like it’s time to start making moves.  i’ve been trying to advance myself in the company i work in and so far that’s not going as planned. i’m finally eating right and working out again which i am reluctant to bring up in this blog because every time i do i immediately blow it.  i feel like if i bring up exercising and stuff on my blog that will inspire me to keep it up since now everyone who reads this will wonder if i keep it up but instead it has the opposite effect and i quit immediately.  Whatever, this time i don’t give an F because it’s for real but yeah i’ll let you know in a few months how that goes. 

i am definitely so SICK of being hugemongous though, f’n enough already. i was doing good for awhile and then my birthday came around and i used that as an excuse to not exercise and eat awful food and booze my face off for an entire month.  Because yeah that’s what i need.  Whatever, sometimes being rattled emotionally is a good thing because my stomach is in knots and i don’t feel like eating much so it’s easier to eat healthy and to eat less in general.  “Are you sure it’s your stomach that hurts and not the sand in your Vagina?”  i don’t think so, the sand doesn’t really hurt. To be honest it more burns then hurts and i think i just need to… Hey F*ck you buddy!

Anyways my job is to make you laugh and not bring you down before the weekend so i’ll get to the ha ha’s already.  Hope you are all doing better then me!

RANDOM NONSENSE

-Alright one more thing i need to bitch about and i’m done i promise.  It really f’n annoys me that i can’t roll my R’s.  i mean, i’ve basically accepted the fact that i will never learn to speak Spanish and that i’m an awful Hispanic and a terrible human being in general for this.  Well for the most part i’ve accepted it, part of me still gets furious for being a non-Spanish speaking lowlife.  But i can’t roll my R’s?  Really?  i don’t even get how to practice or how to get good at it.  So yeah i can’t speak Spanish or roll my R’s.  i am the f’n worst.

-Ok i lied, i’m not done bitching.  i can’t f’n STAND people at mall kiosks who approach me with whatever bull$hit product they are selling.  For real, next one that comes up to me is getting punched right in their gddamn grill.  i’m not in the mall hanging out, okay? i know what i want, and i’m going to those stores and buying my items and getting the F out of there.  So get off my nutsack already.  Your items are garbage anyway, and not only are you a dirty salesman you’re a dirty salesman you works at a mall kiosk bothering strangers.  Get an f’n life already.

“Facebook etiquette”- Hey people who have me “hidden” on Facebook… Go F*ck Yourself!  i’ll give you hide me ahole, all i do is post about my blog and post some funny quotes and stuff once in awhile.  It’s not like i’m filling your page with awful questions or dumb ass games that i play.  Although now that i think about it, i hide a LOT of you people.  If you’ve posted more then one dumb thing which 98% of people do i’ve probably hidden you by now.  In fact, i’ve just checked and my news feed only consists of my sister and two hot girls i currently have crushes on.  So i guess i shouldn’t be so mad at this trend…

Fast food tips--i don’t normally post articles but i really and honestly hope this guy dies by a heart attack today.  Not even in a joking way, i just hope he gets hit by a bus or something worse…

Man Sues White Castle Over Booth Size and Harvest Moon Shines On The Web | Trending Now – Yahoo! News
http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/trending-now/man-sues-white-castle-because-over-booth-size-160126946.html

Actually i take that back, i don’t want that guy hit by a bus, that is way too quick and painless.  i hope he gets a horrible disease that will ravage his body and make life painful forever, but that he won’t be able to afford health care because he spent all his money suing White Castle for being a fat f*ck.  Yeah, that’s what i want.

That’s it for me today kids.  Haha i thought RANDOM NONSENSE would cheer me up but of course i just ranted on that as well.  And i shouldn’t be heated because i’m at 30 followers now!   That actually makes me really f’n happy, and i’m going to ride that happiness into the happy hour i’m going to today.

Speaking of Happy Hours… don’t forget an old school Chex one will be held next Friday at the Pearl River Hotel in Pearl River, NY.  If you’ve never been to a happy hour there then there’s no need to go this time, this one is just for the chex “Veterans.”

Have a great weekend everyone!
-miguel jo$é

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One Response to “You know what I’m sick and tired of, Harry? I’m sick and tired of having to eek my way through life. I’m sick and tired of bein’ a nobody. But most of all, I’m sick and tired of havin’ nobody. – Lloyd, "Dumb and Dumber"”

  1. Anonymous September 16, 2011 at 6:27 pm #

    I can't roll my R's either…and I always say I'm the worst italian because of it lol =)

    -stef =)

    Like

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